Friday Fun - Limerick

Hot and Cold

A woman who frequently bowled

made sure that everyone was told

she would give her all

to a man brave and tall

but only after her ball was rolled

20130325

Ƹ̴Ӂ̴Ʒ εїз Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ

Faire Fare

a man was paring a pear

at the local county fair

he lopped off a piece

that fell into grease

and ended as fried country fare

20130811

Ƹ̴Ӂ̴Ʒ εїз Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ

Addiction

i hope that man gets a fix

though it’s odd how he gets his kicks

he’s a sad sort of fellow

all blue and yellow

until he eats him some raw cake mix

20130917

Devour or Despair

Devour or Despair

a broken blade lies buried in my heart

twisted, torn and raw

tearing my love from me apart

so being not leastwise smart

I unveil my ugly flaw

and seek demonic revenge

with sharpened claw and reeking maw

my angel I avenge

while on my enemies’ bones I gnaw

* * *

It’s hard not to lash out when hurt or angry. Most times I keep myself in check. I’ve caused bloody jagged rips in the hearts of others in the past, but the pain to my own psyche seems to suggest that the deeds were not the balm I needed. Still, I wonder if the calm is a worthy goal.

mindlovemisery - prompt 18: losing control

* * *

Moaning Maid

a woman lamented alone

her king’s heart made of stone

he left her to cry

and eventually die

so she haunted him from his throne

Join Mad Kane's Limerick Off

* * *

Fire and Ice

Some say the world will end in fire,

Some say in ice.

From what I’ve tasted of desire

I hold with those who favor fire.

But if it had to perish twice,

I think I know enough of hate

To say that for destruction ice

Is also great

And would suffice.

by Robert Frost

Poetry Share - Personification

Prompt 6 - Personification

paparazzi

Prompt 5 [20130526]

sylph

kiss light as a breeze

beauty that mesmerizes enchants

slips through my embrace

bondage

there once was a man who liked bondage

with a mistress whose name was Sweet Rage

there was no safe word

at least not that she heard

so they never seemed to disengage

for fun & interesting prompts visit Poetry Share at mindlovemisery

A Limerick Two-fer

Hot and Cold

A woman who frequently bowled

made sure that everyone was told

she would give her all

to a man brave and tall

but only after her ball was rolled

He Lied: A Limerick on Spring

Took a gaze out my window’s pane

expecting to see Spring rain

instead there was snow

enough to cover my big toe

if this keeps up, I’m opening a vein

Join the Limerick-Off at Mad Kane's Humor Blog

Inflate and Inflame

a woman was looking to raise

her man’s libido to a blaze

her boobs went up

the rest got a tuck

and her body of work got her praise



Join the Limerick-Off at Mad Kane's Humor Blog

Keep Up the Fight

A woman was planning her flight
to outrun the emotional blight
of boredom and tears
and unmentionable fears
from the block on her ability to write.


Join the Limerick-Off at Mad Kane's Humor Blog

limerick love

Amanda Moore from MooreBlogLife is paying it forward to Mad Kane’s Humor Blog. I popped in for a visit and found she is asking for limericks beginning with the line: There’s a hint of sweet spring in the air.

i love limericks, so here’s mine

Hint of sweet Spring in the air?
Mother Nature isn't fair.
I find I'm on hold
I have a bad cold
Of my sneezes you beware.

A Poem a Day #6 - Joe Schmo

For today's poem, I want you to write a poem about something missing. It can be about an actual physical object or something you just can't put your finger on (like "love" or "the spirit of Christmas" or something).

Joe Schmo

There once were a feller, Joe,
who had fewer brains than dough.
He opened his yap,
foot into the trap:
he lost way more than his toe.

For more on A Poem a Day, go to Poetic Asides.

Poetry #2 - Eleutherios

"Stone Hearted"
Photograph by Vanessa V. Kilmer © February 8, 2009

Eleutherios

There once was a man named Bart,
struck by the wee archer's dart.
Feeling exquisite pain
from Cupid's good aim -
empassioned his cold, dead heart.

Gone Fishing

Jethro, he was a bounder.
Candy, he sniffed around her.
A two legged dish,
she was his great wish,
even though she smelled of flounder.

Lucky Limerick

"Bunny Fred"

There once was a bunny named Fred
Who sprang early out of his bed
He was no lame duck
With a foot full of luck
Rabbit, rabbit, is what he said.

Photograph & Limerick 07/01/2008
Copyright 2008 Vanessa V. Kilmer

White Trash Weekend

Four generations of one family in an RV for the weekend in the Pine Barrens of New Jersey. Need I say more?

My father turned 77 on Sunday, April 6th. We will be taking him for a NASCAR weekend to Dover International Raceway end of May. Tickets for Sunday’s race at the Start/Finish line, row six: lots of beer and red meat. His favorite driver is Jeff Gordan, who drives car 24 not 45, like The Dip, yours truly, put on his Birthday card.

The limerick for my father:

It’s possible that Jeff could win
At the race where you haven’t yet been.
He could make your day
Special in a birthday way,
As long as his car doesn’t spin.

Ooh La La Limerick

Happy Birthday Sis-In-law
cheeriest girl we ever saw
with pink Martini
the liquid genie
and a snappy Ooh La La.

Two gift tote bags, the outside of my sister-in-law's Birthdat Card and the limerick that is inside.

Limericks - Brotherly Love

Here are two versions of the limerick I wrote for my brother's birthday card. The second one is the version I used.

There once was a fellow named Jim
Who liked his glass filled to the brim
He drank all his beer
Saying bring more here
I don’t care if I break every limb.

* * * ~ ~ ~ * * *

There once was a fellow named Jim
Who liked his beer poured to the brim.
He really had to pee,
So he found a big tree
And dampened the topmost limb.

To find some truely funny stuff, visit HUMOR-BLOGS DOT COM

Juglans

There once was a wacky black walnut.
To avoid a tree rat’s gullet,
he hardened his shell,
rolling away where he fell;
traveling faster than a speeding bullet.