Friday, September 09, 2016

Revena's Revenge ~ this stinks

~ random scene from my novel ~
By the time she reached their neighbors' holdings, her feet were numb and her legs were tired. She stepped out of the creek where the women came to wash their clothes. She needed to find somewhere to hide herself very soon. The sun would be breaching the horizon soon. She would hide in the wash house.
The smell of the aging urine would be strong enough to mask her smell. A day of discomfort would be a small price to pay for her freedom.
Revena crept up to the building. There was no lock on the door because no one would want to steal anything in the building as it only contained barrels of urine fermenting in the building with no windows. While the liquid was valuable for bleaching the woolen garments everyone wore, it wasn't valuable enough to take. Not to mention the foul stench. Revena almost threw up when she first went in.
She covered her mouth and her nose with her shawl. She made her way to a back corner and scrunched down behind a large covered barrel of piss. There was enough room for her to lie down. She rested her head on her bundle. It was warm in the shed so she needed no cover. Despite the horrible smell, Revena fell asleep from her exhaustion. It was Sunday, so she knew no one would come here today to do any washing. Only the most necessary work was done on Sundays and washing was not one of the chores that needed to be done. She slept all day, not stirring until a mouse ran over her outstretched hand resting in the straw covering the floor.
She couldn't bring herself to eat in the shed. The smell was too bad and made her stomach queasy. Revena squinted through the boards of the building and saw no light outside. She rose from the floor and crept through the dark room. She knocked into one of the barrels and a wooden bucket fell to the floor. Revena stood still, holding her breath for several heartbeats. When she heard no other noises she continued more cautiously towards the door. When she reached it she edged it open and looked out.
Full night was upon her and no one was about. All was quiet and still. She left the shed and went around the corner and stepped into another body. She was grabbed around the waist and a hand was clamped over her mouth. She couldn't see the face of her captor but she could tell the person was a man who was much larger than she was.

She was dragged back to the bleaching shed, and pulled inside. She struggled to free herself but only ended up getting herself thrown to the ground, the wind knocked from her lungs as the body of her captor covered hers, his hand never leaving her mouth. Revena attempted to kick the man or knee him in the groin but he wove his legs around hers so she could not move. She tried to open her mouth enough to bite his hand but his hand was so large it kept her jaw closed shut. He was so heavy upon her she could not breathe.

3 comments:

  1. This is cool and gritty and has that intense cliff-hanger at the end that leaves the reader screaming "wait, noooo, what happened?"
    As my bipolar mind tends to wander in multiple directions, I find myself thinking about all the urine I deal with. Cat urine, which is the stinkiest by far. The urine of incontinent patients. And, unfortunately, my own incontinence necessitating the wearing of the Ultimate incontinence pad.
    I couldn't be one of those people who has the occasional laugh or sneeze leak from stress incontinence. Nope, not me. I have urge incontinence, due to nerve issues in my lower spine and exacerbated by my diabetes and the OTC diuretic that I take to help my blood pressure pills do their job correctly. While I usually make the bathroom in time, it doesn't always happen, and when it doesn't happen, it isn't one of those petite little lady-like leaks that they talk about in the Poise pad ads. It's a full on gullywasher.
    Now you know far more than you ever wanted to about me and my weak bladder!

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  2. Well, Cara's weak bladder to one side, this is a cliff hanger and then some. And yes, I too want to read more. It strikes me as either being a novel set in some post apocalyptic future or a historical novel. We no loner soak clothes in urine during the making of them,

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