Wednesday, April 09, 2008

Fire

Flames shot into the air, consuming the breathable oxygen within a twenty foot radius of the conflagration. Attendants placed more timber into the fire pit, bending low in an effort to avoid losing the hair on their hands and arms. The aged wood fed the roaring heat, increasing its hunger instead of satiating it.

The red, orange and purple blaze twisted and danced, until the energy formed a demon with finger tips that stretched to the stars. In unexpected ferocity, the fire fiend reached out and snatched an acolyte to its breast, consuming him in a shriek of agony and pain. The unwilling sacrifice melted and congealed, calming the soul of the inferno.

Update 4/10/08: This was inspired by my brother who can't get enough wood in the firepit to satisfy his boyish heart.

Thank you all for your wonderful comments. This is part of a short story which I will be submitting to the WD writing contest in May.

I will be adding an installment to Divine Death this weekend.

And I updated my reading list on the sidebar to the right there.

31 comments:

  1. ... gosh, next time I'll keep my fireplace under eye :)

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  2. I'm plenty warm enough, thanks.

    IF there is no oxygen within 20 feet, how do the acolytes get close enough to add wood?

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  3. Nicely written...sounds like when I go camping and make a fire...

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  4. Very well said. Made me want to read more.........

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  5. Quilly: Good point. I will reconsider their need to breathe.
    ; D

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  6. Where is this? I'll bring the s'mores!

    Great imagery, Nessa. Good to be back to your blog.

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  7. I like the bit "the energy formed a demon with finger tips that stretched to the stars" good work! Will there be more?

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  8. I think I'll watch from a distance.

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  9. Quite a lot of imagery in your writing...
    sounds like an angry fire.

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  10. Good heavens, that is some wild bonfire! Good twist ending :D

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  11. Great description, detail. Your words just sprang to life. :) I always looked at fire like dancers.

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  12. Thank you for your comment on my blog! Have a nice day :)

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  13. It just doesn't pay to be an acolyte these days.

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  14. The acolyte may have fallen in because of the lack of oxygen.

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  15. This reminds me of one of the World's Shortest Stories - a friend just gave me the first collection and I'm enjoying it a lot. Very grim, Ms. Nessa! I like it!

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  16. Count me in on the s'mores! =D

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  17. Really I felt fired, well said...really nice one

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  18. Powerfully written! Is this part of a larger manuscript?

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  19. I love bonfires, but alas, am allergic to the wood smoke that results. My dad has a firepit, and apparently has the same fire needs as your brother. I can't even go to his house when he gets that thing going!

    Perhaps I am the acolyte at my dad's house. ?

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  20. You delivered the story well,you're good at it!

    Nice post!

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  21. Great. I expected a dragon to arise.

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  22. ...and I just got back from Dr. John's Fortress and read his most recent post. I do believe this post of yours must be a cause of global warming :)

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  23. On-topic first--I loved this piece. You write the way I wish I could.

    If you want to direct folks to my goodies, send them to the blog--I'm still struggling with writing a website/store so the inventory posts will have all ordering information.

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  24. talking of conflagrations using up all breathable oxygen within 20ft radius type experiences... I remember one personal bonfire night when our enormous fire "strangely" managed to become riddled with old batteries that went off like bombs causing havoc among the crowd... I have an idea who put them there but can't prove it... the same person who chose to let off our rockets on such a low trajectory they were practically firing into people's bedroom windows! nasty business!! great post though

    ;->...

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  25. Makes me want to go play with matches.
    You are a talented writer...a tapestry of words you can weave.

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  26. I had to look up what acolyte meant.You conjure up vivid and rich images with your writings.

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