I believe the most important trait in another human being is honesty; real honesty between two people. Blunt, truthful, sincere and helpful honesty, so I know where the other person is coming from. I don’t want polite, politically correct comments. I want the truth.
Sure a sense of humor is important. I love to laugh. I like it when people tell me jokes. I bore easily, so entertainment is a big thing with me, but you can’t build a life on it. Well, you can if you live in the amusement park called Hollywood, but most of us don’t.
Romance, manners and politeness are good. They make life seem pretty and rosy and comfy-cozy. But they often cover up realities that help us negotiate through the obstacles that everyone encounters. Life sucks and someone should tell you before it’s too late. Being polite to Ted Bundy got a lot of women killed.
Both my husband and my daughter treat me with honesty and I return the favor. When my husband drinks too much and doesn’t get done the things he had planned because he had a hangover, I don’t say, “Oh, honey, you were sick.” I say, “Maybe next time you’ll know better.” When my daughter complains that she’s driving a beat up old mini van and all of her friends have cool cars, I don’t say you poor deprived child, I say, “Get a job and you can have one, too.” When I’m being a bitch and whining and throwing mini hissy fits, my husband tells me to quit acting like an ass and get over myself. I say, “Fuck off.” And we all feel better.